Newcomer

My whole heart for my whole life. ~ French saying used on poesy rings

CRASH!

Taken by the collar to be thrown against the wall again, only this time he fell onto a pile of books by his bed. He should have returned them where they belong, the bookshelves, so it would be his back slammed against the cold concrete instead of tumbling like a clumsy fool. Fool of fools.

A hand stroke swift, pinned him seated on the floor. A man trapped between another man and a wall. Their eyes met, the predator growled, the prey sat defensive. “What is it this time? The seventh one?” The predator, tall with his well-toned body and neck-long, layered hair stared straight into the eyes of his victim. Under the moonlight his hair was obviously jet black with a tint of red on the edges. He growled silently, revealing the four, perfect canine teeth.

The prey, as well-built as his predator flinched not. The cool wind of night dances between the strands of his hair. His was long, slightly down to half of his elbow. Somewhat darkish brown and tinted black on the edges. He stared back at the man before him, unafraid. As stubborn as the other was, as persistent as the other was yet calm as an autumn’s lake.

The hand stroke again. This time it barely missed it’s victim face. The predator couldn’t understand it. Endlessly searching for an answer in the other’s eyes, a conclusion failed to be made. He was his brother, this man calmed enough to stir the anger within him. An anger he nurtured within since they were small…

Gabriel was lenient with Emma, much too lenient. Luc just couldn’t understand it.

“Gabe, why? Doesn’t it bother you at all? He’s like, what, the seventh guy we went through and it doesn’t bother you at all? Not even for a second? She cried, for goodness sake, she cried, Gabe!”

Luc withdrew from his brother and threw himself onto his own bed. He laid on the comfort of his fleece bedspread their mother had given him. He was frustrated. Cruel as she was, the night wind teased them in the awkward silence. Gabriel sat still on the floor, head leaned against the wall.

“It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it, Luc?” He said, gazing into the dark sky. The moon seemed to agree for she shone on him her faint light.

“Shut up, Gabe.”
“Why? I thought you liked the night, just as I do.”
“I said, shut up.”
“Luc…”
“Why, Gabe, why? Why can’t you just tell her to stop the nonsense? If you don’t, she’ll keep on seeing those kind of jerks. They’re never going to tell her the exact thing. Those kind never does and never will. They’re all just acting nice. If you don’t tell her, you’ll…well, she’ll get hurt again. You know things could get worst.”

As if Luc’s words stroke him at the very depths of his heart, Gabriel heaved a heavy sigh. A feeling he failed to overcome, harboured within him. Indeed, Emma gave in to her tears. Indeed, she was depressed by this one particular guy. Caine Oliver, yes. I wonder what it was that she saw in him, Gabriel thought. She was never so…attached, not even with Ryan. Gabriel’s eyes wandered for his brother till finally he said, “You know I can’t. It’s impossible. I’m here, we’re here only to watch over her. We’re her Guardians and as a Guardian, this feeling should be eliminated. I am happy enough. And I will make sure my job is well done.”
“It won’t be easy and I’m not helping you out in this one,” Luc replied.
“Don’t worry, I’ll manage.”

Gabriel stood up and headed towards his brother. Towering over him, he smirked. “You know,” he said, “It hurts when you hit me against the wall. And my back is still aching.” Luc glared at him.
“Oh no, you don’t! Get away from me, Gabe! Away, I said!”

Like little children, they chased each other in the room they shared. The moon smiled on them. Guardians they were, Gabriel and Luc were like any other brothers. They bullied and played with one another. They stood and fought for one another. Like the little children they used to be, they chased each other in the dimmed moonlight. Like the little children reflected in their shadows tonight.

*****

Knock, knock!

The brothers stopped.

“Gabe? Are you asleep? I need to talk with you, that is if you are awake..” It was Emma at the door. Luc turned to Gabriel and nodded.

“I’ll be right there, Milady.”

Gabriel knew Luc was right. It just wasn’t the right time. And yes, he will manage. He always did. Emma might fall for another guy sooner or later but he, Gabriel von Drake, as her Guardian, stands by her side. Just in case she got runny eyes again. His feelings could wait for another day. For now, he was happy just being there for her. He knew he could enjoy living with his feelings locked away or suffer through the whole ordeal.

Somehow, somewhere Gabriel thought he heard a sinister laugh in the background. A very familiar voice… And a very familiar figure waiting in the hallway, next to Emma.

“Oh, there you are, Gabe. Meet the Narrator, a dear friend of mine. Wanted to meet you so…” Emma leaned closer and whispered, “..just between us, he’s a fellow of his own.”

Gabriel figured it wasn’t only he and Luc his lady had conjured. He didn’t knew it. “Milady, I don’t mean to question you but I’ve a strange feeling I’ll be introduced to more of these soon. Perhaps you wouldn’t mind filling in the blanks for me before my next, err, introduction.”

The Narrator was smiling.

“Oh, I’m sure she will tell, won’t you Emma? There will be more to come, yes?”

Luc noticed his brother’s awkward tone. He knew this Narrator being was just the beginning of things yet to come - possibly more trouble for them, since Emma’s emotions are getting out of control. That combined with her sneaky mind, why, anything could happen. Luc drew a deep breath and carved a smile for the newcomer. It was cracking however. This being, the so-called Narrator.

The voice of tales and the keeper of the heart, a battle between two non-existent beings hoping for the favour of the girl who conjured them simply with her mind. Luc’s smile turned into a smirk.

“This can be interesting…”

(AI) Did you..?

I just wonder, my dear
how does it feel to be you?
for a second I’d give anything
a second to know how it is to be you
knowing that I meant my every word
do they mean anything to you though
when I said I loved you

Did you flinch, my dear
or did you perhaps suffered cold sweats?
for here’s another one just like the others
Did you smile true, thinking it was sweet
or unbelieving it came from me?

Did you wonder too, my love
what drove me to say it loud
what kept me silent after all was said

Did you wonder, tell me dear
Did you wonder how would it feel to be me
just for a second
just to know how it feels to love someone so much as I have claimed?

Did you?

cause I wondered…
to be you…
and feeling how it is to know someone would love you dearly
when you are still strangers to each other

Did you wonder if I’d be true
or whether it’s just but an interlude?

Did you love me too?

Letting go

Happiness, that grand mistress of the ceremonies in the dance of life, impels us through all its mazes and meanderings, but leads none of us by the same route. - Albert Camus

Moonlight dimmed. The night wind hummed breezy. Emma sat staring at her PC screen, backtracking the most recent happenings in her life. Her life was a real roller-coaster - her love life was at least, between first sights and second thoughts. What she was certain of at first now deemed an illusion. A mere creation within her imagination. She was doing it again.

A few months ago, Emma took to liking Caine, trusting it was indeed real love - not her truest but simply a realistic one. He made her laugh more than any other guy did. He stood up for her. He was there for her when she needed him. And he cared for her… Together they spent some precious life-sharing moments, building their trust on each other block by block, the foundation being a firm, strong base called Love. For a moment her naive mind thought he could be “the One”. If it was a movie it would be called “By Chance”, he would have won the Best Actor Award in the Golden Globes and she would be taking the Best Supporting Actress Award home.

It was so perfect!

…but she soon found out that nothing was and is perfect. Nothing will ever be.

Cared for. That was all it was. Indeed, it was only a movie, he was the best actor. It was disappointing, still, for Emma didn’t win her award. She cried. She regretted. Her heart was shattered. For a moment, her desire to be whisked away, away from it all yearns stronger in her veins. It was the typical reaction. How foolish she was to easily believe it. How foolish of her to fall in love.

A fool in love, she always was. Guys came and left, leaving bittersweet memories. Emma and her guys never dated, although only one of them did date her. Yet the memories, the memories were beautiful enough to last a lifetime.

It has always been that way…

“Em, look on the bright side, at least…” His fingers brushed the strands of her hair tenderly. Gabriel whispered softly in her ears, “We tried, didn’t we?”

“I know, Gabe, I know. Somehow, my presence in their lives seemed to catapult their consciousness. They’re going for what they think is good. I believe in them - even if it will draw us apart. I’m doing it again. I… I’m letting go. Again.” There was a shiver in her voice.

Tears. Warm tears of hers. Her emotionless face. A cold, closed heart she owned. Gabriel hold her tight, like a brother comforting his little sister when she lost her doll, his mind in silence said, Milady, I’m sorry. Perhaps it is getting to you now. After all those times you tried to bar them within. Your feelings are showing. He was your friend. A great friend. Your best friend.

Luc snorted, leaning crossed-arm against the door, as he watched his twin brother and Emma. What happened was nothing to cry about. Those guys, they were lucky to even know her. They knew they were. The only problem was they never told her how they felt. Luc knew them well. Like Gabriel who watches over Emma, Luc watched over her guys. Just as Gabriel’s job was to ensure he happiness, his was to ensure they make her happy. Where did he went wrong? No where. It was a matter of the kind of guys she chose. They were all the same, really. Those who kept things to themselves because they didn’t want her to worry, to cry. Well, she did cry in the end, didn’t she?

His eyes fixed on the couple, Luc felt pity for his brother instead.

Why didn’t you tell her yet, Gabe? She can’t hear you for long… They always grow up. When she does, it’ll be too late then.